Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Sangria Sunday's with the Girls

Hey Beautiful People,
I’m on my third Blog in 2 weeks !!! Aren’t you proud of me, LOL.  Recently I attended a Bloggers Like Me Lunch Lab Series at the Marmalade CafĂ© in El Segundo, CA, that discussed “Leveraging Your Blog into Serious Profit”.

The price of the event was reasonable, the small and intimate cafe was perfect, our lunch was delicious and the presenter Social Media expert Natalie Gouche was EXCELLENT! My attendance allowed me to meet other bloggers that were serious about taking their business to the next level. The lunch lab was from 11am to 2pm and every seat in the room was occupied. The information Natalie blessed us with was PRICELESS!

As I took notes I realized I need to step my game up! I definitely enjoy writing my Blog and sharing my experiences, it’s very different from my “chosen career” and it’s a release for me.  Although all the information Natalie reviewed with us did not necessarily apply to me (as of yet) it was good information I may be able to use in the future or share with others.
Sidebar - My blog really isn't about making money but an outlet for me to talk to “EVERYONE” who can relate to the struggle of being single. Now if you want to pay me to travel or host Singlenfabulous  Co-ed Mixers, or Heart2Heart discussions, WE CAN DEFINITELY talk (code for Negotiate, LOL)!!!
This event allowed me to meet some really successful and sweet ladies that were very encouraging and inspiring!

Yulunda at www.Yimwriteous.com , Josslyn at www.mochasandmiracles.com , Carol www.evolvingyourimage.com , and Lila @curvygirlsncurls , Make sure you check out their pages!

As a result of this event I have been Blogging my little Heart Out!!
Which leads me to talk about today's Adventure... Sangria Sunday’s at the Bonaventure Brewing Company
Now let me give you the deets on my most recent Adventures at Sangria Sunday’s! I first heard about it last summer when it was being held at the Sofitel in Beverly Hills. Well this summer it’s being held at the Westin Bonaventure Hotel in Downtown L.A.  Sangria Sunday’s is hosted by www.InTheMixLA.com and the entertainment consists of live music and a DJ.
My good friend Nikki  invited me to go and said she and a few friends were reserving a table. I’ve never been before and it was the perfect weekend to go (I had no plans)! I didn’t know we were still celebrating her birthday and so I had no idea we were going to be about 16 deep, LOL. The picture only shows a few of the successful women I hang out with (wink). A lot more came later and when I tell you these ladies know how to party…they make you want to be everywhere they are!

The champagne was flowing and the music was on point! I should not be in charge of pouring the drank!  Alcohol was everywhere, LOL.
As we got comfortable listening to a rotation of Live Music and the DJ the place gets packed real quick. This event was more popular than I thought, a Good Look with a mature crowd. As I observe the people in the crowd I see an “old flame” . Of course I didn’t expect to see him there but we are cool so I greeted him. He came to support one of his boys and I was there with my girls. The opportunity came later in the day where we had the chance to talk alone for a minute. Honestly, he’s a good guy but I just don’t think I’m the one for him. Yes we do have history and it’s not like we haven’t been down this road before. Unfortunately, at that time, he wasn’t ready to settle down and I was. Now we are both in a different place in our lives and are more mature. Although we are real cool friends, we always have great conversations and the chemistry is there… I feel like neither one of us are willing to invest the time into turning this friendship into more. We’ve made some attempts in the past but then life gets in the way. Maybe it’s not meant to be…??? Ladies & Gentlemen, your opinion and advice are Welcome! Feel free to sound off on what you think I should do ??

Overall I had a good time hanging out with the girls and I highly recommend Sangria Sunday’s for people who just want to get out, have a good time and relax. Did I meet anybody NEW no, but did I enjoy myself Yes and I think that’s all that matters. I know that I’m not always going to meet someone every time I go out so I make sure I have FUN when I do go out!

But what I'm not going to do is give my number to the Man flirting with every woman standing in line at the bathroom. He was a damn fool and had the nerve to follow me to our reserved section! My girl Nikki gave him "the stank eye" and had to let him know "keep your hands where I can see them!" Lmao! I LOVE HER!! Big Sister wasn't havin' it! I guess I’m going to have to keep my Options open (wink).
Stay Tuned...The Adventures of SingleNFabulous Must Go On...


Wednesday, July 15, 2015

My Standards are NOT too High!

Hi Beautiful People,

Surprise!!! I'm baaaaaack....So Soon....Already!!!! Yes.

My Sisters!! #throwback
 After attending my Bloggers Like Me Lunch Lab Series on Saturday I've regained my Motivation. I've made a personal commitment to devote more time and promotion to my Blog.  Goal #1 post a Blog entry every week! So my Blogs are going to involve more than just my Single Life Shenanigans but also Conversations that make us think about our lives, our standards and what we want from our "future partners". Please feel free to dialogue with me about any and every topic because I'm sure we can all relate in some way, shape or form!

Please forgive me for this long blog post BUT it's REALLY GOOD and from a MAN's Perspective!!!

Thank you to my Facebook Friend Eena who shared this Post on Facebook it was a really good read and helped solidify that I AM NOT CRAZY!!! This is Exactly What I'm Looking For in a Man!

by Michael Jai White (Actor)

In all my years as a grown man I knew, without a doubt, that women were different than men and required a gang of emotional attention. I came to the resolution that part of a man’s role was to endure women’s emotional neediness by patronizing them much as you would a child: “Yes, Dear, I’m listening”…even though this is some rhetorical BS. ” Of course I miss you… even though I just saw yo ass a little while ago! “I see you’re calling me”… even though I just F*^#ing talked to you 20 minutes ago! As a man, you have to deal with hand holding, “yes dear,” and freaking cuddling! I endured this for years until my relationships reached their natural demise due to some natural chemistry flaw between us or the woman’s natural chemical imbalance- Yes I said it! I believed ALL WOMEN WERE CRAZY and the only choice a man had was to decide exactly how much crazy he’s willing to deal with to sustain a relationship. It’s crazy to think I, as a man, would ever want to spend every waking moment with a woman, to be all-up-on each other constantly, to talk endlessly about “every-damned-thing” and see each other “every-damned-day!” I was always the spoiled Alpha Male who didn’t have to try as hard and I dealt out advise to my brethren due to my abundant experience with women. I had Alpha Females, “Dime Pieces” with degrees and plenty of them! I pretty much got every woman I wanted, rich or famous and who could argue with my numbers? On every level, I was “The Man!” Agreed? Well take my numbers, “Dime Pieces,” and vast experience and apply it to what I’m about to say- I WAS WRONG ABOUT WOMEN ALL THESE YEARS! My Ex’s were right!
The interesting thing about every good argument is the shifting percentages of validity on each opposing side, but only one concept will tip the argument past the 51% and expose the unflinching reality of the truth. My new life philosophy is to look forward to being wrong because each time I’m wrong, I learn something that unlocks the door to a concept I struggled to understand. The truth is then revealed and to live in the truth is to live in enlightenment.
I am now in a relationship that I never knew was even possible. I’m in love with my best friend who I shower with endless affection, talk to all times of the day and miss the moment I leave her side. I now understand what the women of my past desired from me. They INSTINCTIVELY KNEW that love actually looked this way! Everything from the hand holding to countless daily declarations of love were not only a byproduct of the man’s emotions but it was something easily volunteered by the man who’d truly loved them. I simply didn’t love my Ex’s in the capacity their spirits knew organically needed to be loved. I believe woman nowadays have learned to settle for what’s FAMILIAR to love. In turn, they’ve had to decide how much of a man’s love they can live without to sustain a relationship. As we men are natural leaders in providing security, it is women who are the natural leaders in how to love. They are instinctively born with the barometer to feel when love is real. The behaviors they’ve required from men IS the behavior that is true for love. The crazy lesson for men is that YOU’LL NEVER KNOW HOW MUCH OF A MAN YOU CAN BE UNTIL YOU TRULY LOVE SOMEONE BEYOND YOURSELF. I can say that I am now the very best version of myself and that’s due entirely to my relationship. My perspective is clear, my goals are defined, distractions are nonexistent, my business and personal relationships are stronger than ever. I don’t feel like “The Man,” anymore. I feel like A MAN.

P.S. This post definitely gives me FAITH because although this is Michael Jai White's second marriage he finally found "The One" woman that completes him....and he's only a few years older than me! LOL

People always ask me if my standards are too high? My answer will always be NO. I strongly believe that MEN should set their standards higher!
Therefore the Adventures of SingleNFabulous Must Go On!!!

**I apologize beautiful people but I had to remove the picture of Michael Jai White and his wife to avoid copyright infringement**

Monday, July 13, 2015

To Be or Not to Be Single! My Dilemma

Hey Beautiful People,

So I’ve done nothing special in my social life short of hanging out with my family, going to the Nicki Minaj concert at the BET Experience, Girls Night Out at Dave & Buster’s and going to see Magic Mike XXL. I highly recommend Magic Mike it’s a great Movie, LOL.

Oh and I cut my hair! 

I registered on Match.com but I haven’t broken down to pay the monthly fee that allows me to converse with those who’ve liked my pics, sent a message or have shown any type of interest. Online dating feels forced to me and I don’t feel I should have to pay for it (smh, that’s me being stubborn). But at some point I might succumb to the pressure!

Am I lazy? Possibly.

Am I old fashion and just wish I could meet someone
 “in person” organically? Definitely.

Do I feel there are other things in life more important than dating? Yes, lol.

But ultimately would I like a companion who gets me, loves to hang out with me (& my doggie), travel with me, be adventurous or just relax in front of the TV? Most definitely!

Do I live in my own little “fantasy world” where the relationship I’d like to have is much easier than what they really are? High Probability!

My ultimate goal is “marriage”, but lately when talking to other people about marriage I get mixed reviews. You know how people say you don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, until you are deep in it. Well it sounds like you can’t predict what you are signing up for. We as children growing up observe our parent’s, loved ones or close family friends and their relationships and their experiences vary. From what appears to be loving and caring to down right I just don’t like you anymore! Hey life changes and people change.

But what they don’t tell you is everything you are getting when you make this type of commitment. It is only now as an adult that I am able to observe friends and families marriages (on the outside looking in) and understand what type of commitment, understanding and difficulties they have to endure as a couple. Then when children are involved it makes things even more complicated.

We, as women, are raised to believe we should marry, have children, and take care of the home, etc. Is this old fashion YES but apparently it worked for generations before us.  In today’s society some women have the desire to have a nuclear family and some don’t (to each her own)! Me personally I’d like to have children but that ship may have already sailed. It’s hard enough just to find a compatible partner let alone having kids in this day and age...We must think twice about bringing a child into this world. Our reasoning can not be "selfish", we must think of what our child is going to be subjected to and if we are ready to deal with the challenges that come with it.

There have been several times in my life where I’ve questioned why ‘God’ (for those of you who believe in him or her, lol) hasn’t introduced me to “The One”.  I believe it’s natural to wonder why and I know I should be patient but I’m 40 and I’m not getting any younger. I’m assuming that it’s not my time right now! But then I had a thought….What if I’m just meant to be SINGLE??!!

So I took a minute to reflect on the “benefits” of being Single. I live alone (well technically with my sister),  I come and go as I please, I travel when I want, I don’t have to check-in with anyone, I have the freedom to converse when any guy I want with no obligations, I spend my money on what I want and my life is drama free. So I guess I can’t complain. But even after listing all these things, the one thing I do miss is “companionship”. I love my dog to death but she just can’t fulfill that part of my life.

So I continue to go out and enjoy life and hope that I accidentally run into someone that is made “just for me “.  

If it happens, it happens.

So until then…
the Adventures of Singlenfabulous must go on... Stay Tuned!