There was a contest (that I entered and didn't win) that motivated me to write this Blog. Despite my disappointment I think it turned out pretty funny but I'd rather hear your thoughts (male and female alike)! So grab a drink and tell me what you think. Feel free to share it with your friends too, Enjoy!
Being a single woman in L.A. is not all it’s cracked up to be. As this city is considered THE most popular city on the West Coast this can be a blessing and a curse, from the horrendous traffic to the influx of new people moving here to become #instafamous. As a result, the competition to get a Husband is Brutal. Here’s just a small taste of what I experience while living in Los Angeles.
The $hit I have to go through being Single in L.A.
10 Assumptions Men make About Single Women in L. A. - Finding Bae!
1. We are intimidating because we have our “$hit” together!
Yes I am highly educated and I am focused on my career. I don’t waste my time on lazy men because a man with goals and ambition is SEXY. But I also need you to be able to step up to the plate and ask a girl out. I don’t bite, unless you want me too (wink).
2. You assume that we are “bougie” because you watch Reality TV and think that we are all “Hollywood”.
I’m an original L.A. girl and I love my city but trying to get a date out here is like “pulling teeth”. It doesn’t help that women outnumber men 10 to 1 (I’m just making those numbers up but that’s really what it feels like). Must we all fight over the same man?
3. Just because we have expectations you assume that our standards are “too high”.
No it means your standards are too low. Can’t a girl have SOME requirements?? I’m not saying he has to make 6 figures, be 6 feet tall and have 6 acres of land. But you can’t live with your mama, have 6 kids and make $6 an hour. I’m just saying!
4. You assume that something is “wrong” with us because we’re single
Why do I have to be “crazy” because I don’t have a man. Why can’t I just be waiting patiently for my “partner-in-crime”. Now I might drive by your house in the middle of the night if you don’t call me back but that’s only because I thought we had a “connection”, LMAO!
5. You assume that we are just too damn Independent
I concur. I really think that it’s just that we’ve been single for soooooooo long that we are so use to doing everything by ourselves that we have trouble giving up this role and relying on someone who may or may not want the responsibility. I mean think about it…a man comes into your life says all the right things and then the next thing you know he’s become very comfortable on your couch watching the NFL network, remote in one hand and balls in the other, then complains when you ask him to take out the trash. Which brings me to my next issue…
6. You assume we don’t cook.
This is simply not true. Times have changed. No I don’t cook 3 course meals like your mom did when you were growing up, after working a 12 hour day. But I can prep your meals on Sunday and you can have leftovers all week, Lol. Here’s an idea – Why don’t you cook and have a delicious meal ready when I come home (Ha! I think I’m asking too much)
7. You think you won’t be a priority in our lives.
Whaaaaat ??? I don’t know a woman who doesn’t want a MAN in her life. We just want to make sure you are ready to make the commitment. I feel like the man waits until he's almost 40 years old before he finally decides okay I’ve played the field enough and I’m ready to settle down. Really??? My eggs have damn near dried up and my biological clock is hanging on for dear life. Then you wonder why we act like we don’t need you (refer back to #5).
8. You assume we have commitment issues…
But it's really "you" who has the commitment phobia. You want all the "wifey" perks but no investment. You want us to cook, clean, satisfy you BUT we just friends.
9. You are intimidated by us and assume we have a man.
This is actually more common than you think! I've noticed that men rarely approach me when I'm out with my girlfriends or even when I'm alone. I mean you can be low key stalking me and I wouldn't know it. I need a man to see me and NOT be intimidated but confident enough to make his move (put in the work)...OR I will chew you up and spit you out.
Which brings me to my last and Final point...
#10 What happened to "courting"? Do you even know what that is?? Did "chivalry" commit suicide??? Women like to be pursued, show your interest in her (introduce yourself, don’t send a friend to do it), pick up the phone and call her (yes I mean have an actual phone conversation), ask her out on a date (going to the movies is not a first date), meet her at the restaurant (no you can't come to my place I don't know you like that), pay for a meal, meet for happy hour or go have coffee (chivalry is not dead).
Now don't get me wrong I'm not into male bashing or breaking Guy Code because I love MEN. This is just a guideline for those guys who are guilty of either ONE or ALL of the above.
P.S. As a woman I am not completely oblivious to the fact that “us women” have our own issues too! BUT this isn't about us so come up with your own damn list about women who are “single & crazy” (Smile)
Until Next time...The Adventures of SingleNFabulous Must Go On!