10 Things That Keep A Woman Single according to a MAN!

Hey Beautiful People,
 

My first Official Dodger Game...LA all Day!

I recently read an article about why women are single that came from the perspective of a Man and I found it very interesting. I did not get offended and the various topics he discussed seemed realistic. I think this is a good Self-Reflection tool for us single ladies to use. After reading the article I could honestly say I do not believe I fall into any of these categories...except for one Number #3! It wouldn't hurt for me to do better in this area (smiley face)...I'm working on it!

 
Let's review -

The Things That Keep A Woman Single

By Evan Moore of www.chicagonow.com

 

Here’s our list of things single women should stop doing RIGHT NOW to change their fortunes:

 
1. Your friends and family are poisoning your love life.
 
Nothing makes a single man cringe like a woman who insists that her bff, mom, big sister take on an active role in their dating lives. Look, we want to date you. Not your FB friends list. No man wants to think about dating a woman long term who can’t take a dump without soliciting advice from the nearest member of the clique. When you invite people who don’t have to live with the consequences of their judgment into your love life, you only are inviting frustration. Be a big girl. Make decisions on people based on your best judgment.
 

2. Get out of your momma’s house.

Look we get it. It’s a rough economy and plenty of guys are still under mom’s roof too. But really, how is that going to work long-term? No man wants to be picking you up from your mom’s house like its prom night. If you are not financially secure enough to have your own place, you are NOT ready to date, and you’re DAMN SURE not ready to be in a relationship.

3.  Get in shape

We know, we know….we are shallow, misogynistic heathens. But guess what, we are men. We are visual creatures. We know what we like. For most of us sans a small segment of chubby chasers, some of us don’t like the biggens. It is what it is. You can’t realistically be pushing two spins and then wonder why the cute guy on your bus stop with the ripped up arms and flat stomach just doesn’t seem to be into you.

4. Tone down the God stuff, really

 
Hey, we know some of you ladies love Jesus, but he will be the only man in your life if we think we have to compete with him for your attention. This is a touchy subject and we know faith plays a big part of many of your lives. However, if you go to church more than you go on dates then you are narrowing your pool of available men.

5. Shut up and get off the phone

Women are social creatures. We understand your need to go on and on for hours about….nothing. However, like the rest of this list, we are telling you what a man is thinking when we see this kind of behavior. In this case, we are thinking, "Dear god, does she ever stop?” The BFF will live if you don’t call her and complain about the b---h in the next cubicle over.

6. Get out of the Club…..now!

Look, you are not on campus anymore. Being in a club four or five nights per week is not a good look. No man wants a woman that he has to have the DUI lawyer on speed dial. There are many ways to meet men without dressing up like an extra from a Beyoncé video and partying like its 1999.

7. Your Facebook page is your worst enemy.

In the social media age, nothing will tell the tale about you as a woman more than your Facebook page. Here are three things that are an immediate deal breaker with the fellas. First, if you have 300 pictures on your profile, and 299 of them are of you, you are basically telling Mr. Right that YOU are the most important thing in your world; I mean damn, you don’t have a dog or something? Second, put some clothes on. That’s exactly what we as men want, a mate where all my bro’s have seen your asscrack. Third, control your emotions. Nothing says potential stalker/drama queen like a woman who lashes out constantly in frustration over the men she dates.

8. Carry yourself like someone who actually likes men.

Attitude is everything. The last thing a man wants to add to his life is a woman who is mean, combative or bitter. If you have unresolved issues, get counseling. A man is not a punching bag or a psychologist. You say “He’s not strong enough for me!” No lady, Everclear is not strong enough for you. So many ladies out there have taken the “bad b---h” attitude. Some guys may gravitate to that for a one night fling. Most avoid it for legal reasons….I’m just saying.

9. Know your role

One of the primary reasons the fellas will put your ass on waivers is because the woman cannot or will not play her position. I don’t mean be submissive or look the other way if he’s being shady. I mean be a friend if he wants a friend, be a great lover if that’s what it is, be a girlfriend if both of you decide that’s the right thing to do. Nothing will get you put into the “f--k buddy” file faster than demanding or taking privileges designed for someone you are not. If you are not his girlfriend, why are you checking his phone or asking where he was last night? You can’t force a man into anything he doesn’t want to do. Earn his trust and admiration before you earn his ire.

 
10. Temper your expectations.

Let’s be very honest. Lots of men out here ain't s--t. We know that. However, just like your flawed ass, men have imperfections that can change over time; maybe they won’t. But for you to demand that Mr. Right should be running a Fortune 500 company, benching 300 pounds, while making your mother giggle from jokes is just downright silly. Be realistic about what you want. Everybody has likes and dislikes, its human nature. But when you create unrealistic and in some cases, bizarre barriers to meeting men, you are only narrowing the pool of candidates. That guy that works for the streets and sanitation crew with a two-year-old son may not be the best option, but he IS an option. The guy living in the shady hood with the beater car that works at Target and goes to school at night may not be taking you to San Tropez anytime soon, but I’ll guarantee he’ll take you somewhere nice every year if you stick with him and build something together.

Honorable Mention:

Comparing your girlfriend’s husband or boyfriend to your mate. Men hate that.

Just because a man compliments you or tells you good morning does not mean that he is hitting on you. He’s just being polite.

It’s okay to read Steve Harvey’s book. But tread lightly.

Now that you've read the article...Leave a Comment and let me know what you think about the Male Perspective!
 

In the meantime...

The Adventures of SingleN Fabulous Must Go On...Smooches!

Single By Choice

Hey Beautiful People,

Long Beach Jazz Festival

As I peruse through the news feed of social media called Facebook, lol, I have come across a few articles my friends have posted that involves a lot of commentary regarding the future of childless single women. Society has all of a sudden taken an interest in the fact that there are an abundance of women in society that are single with no children- By Choice! It's like a new cultural phenomenon. Really?

So you know... I have an opinion on this subject!
Please note that there are always Exceptions to the Rule! There will always be those females that are looking for a man to take care of them...so men watch your back!

I concluded a long time ago that I am

Single by CHOICE!

I'm damn near 40....If I don't know what I want in a man by now something is definitely wrong with ME!!

I know what I like and I know what I want and I refuse to SETTLE! As discouraging as dating has been it does help that in the past I've met men who fit my #1 Man Profile...so my expectations are not Too High and what I'm asking for is not Too Much! I can give you a list of what I like but it's going to be real generic (good personality, a sense of humor, passionate about life, career-oriented, and loves children, etc..) but what woman doesn't want that in a man. I can be more specific but then we will be here all night. Simply put...I know him when I meet him....it's just a feeling you get when you are comfortable with someone. If I don't get that Vibe when I meet you then you don't have a shot in Hell...Lmao...Sorry!

Historically the men that I've shown interest in do not necessarily have the same interest in me...and that's okay! It is not the end of the world...at least not for me! So what do I do? I continue to go out and have Fun and I just hope and pray I run into someone who is as passionate about me as I am about them.

That being said...I have no intention of having children without a spouse! Of course I'm sad and disappointed that there is a possibility that I may not have children but I look at life realistically. I don't want to raise a child alone (it's hard as hell), single parenthood is not all it's cracked up to be (I've seen others struggle) and kids now days are no joke (the come out the vagina grown)! In addition, look at the society in which we have to raise them??!! I'm a proud Auntie of a niece that I'm overly protective about and a dog I treat as if she were my child. I know it's not the same but it works for me...don't judge me...Girl Code! (smile)

In the meantime, You know me I try to get out as much as possible. But sometimes there are those days when you just want to relax at home with your dog, Lol. But it's Summer time so I can't stay home too long. I've attended several Jazz Festivals and grown and sexy birthday parties. I'm going to try to travel outside my comfort zone more often in an effort to mix and mingle.

My life is good...I can't complain. And if the path I'm on right now is to be Single...then so be it...I'm going to be damn good at being Single! I have to have faith that when the time is right it will happen for me!

Congratulations to all the newlyweds, newly engaged and those happy in a long term relationship...this is my ultimate goal.

However, I will leave you with this famous modified quote, "I got 99 problems but a F@#k'd up relationship ain't one" Lol...I'd rather wait!

Stay Tuned...The Adventures of SingleNFabulous are in full effect!

Smooches

20 Years in the Making...

Hi Beautiful People,

Now that I'm back on track to having "A Life"...

I will be publishing more of my weekly shenanigans!

With that being said...this past weekend was my 20 Year High School Reunion - Morningside High School Class of 1993. Yeah I know...I'm getting OLD. As long as I don't look it I'm a happy camper (wink)!

It all started about 1 year ago!! The invention of Facebook helped me to reunite with some of my former MHS classmates so we could come together to plan this reunion!

 
Flashback - What had happened was...I tried to plan the 10 year Reunion on my own because no one wanted to help. There was a reunion company (who will remain nameless, smh) that was involved and trying to help but they were bootleg! Needless to say it didn't work out. So naturally, because we did not have a 10 Year Reunion it was only fitting that we plan a 3 Day Weekend for our 20 Year Reunion.

Fast forward to Summer 2012 and because of social media at least 8 people volunteered to be apart of the Reunion Committee. We met on a monthly basis and with the support of our alumni we were able to raise $500 to book our Ballroom at the Courtyard Marriott in Pasadena. Of course there were issues during this year long journey - people dropped out of the committee, some people were not doing their share of the work and we were always dealing with various excuses, etc.. It was very frustrating for those people who were consistent every time! We had to pray to get through the last few months because a couple of people were on the verge of getting cursed out!!!!!!

 
Finally the 3 Day Weekend had arrived. My twin sis and I booked a room at the hotel because we did not want to drive back and forth from LA to Pasadena all weekend. 

Unfortunately, my Twin sis had to work late so she did not make it to the Friday night Festivities!! But you know I did...and of course I took lots of pictures!! I don't mind playing paparazzi because I like documenting my memories!!

Friday Night - Mix & Mingle Time

Oh shit! Bar Celona was our Spot!!! It wasn't the original location we choose but it worked itself out. Food and drank that's all we needed. We were going to go over to Club Menage two doors down but they were trippin on us and trying to enforce a cover charge after a certain time. Good thing Bar Celona's DJ was cool and kept the party going!!! We already had a big enough section for our group and it was FREE! All it took was for Phoenix Breaux to walk in the door with a very "generous friend" and shots, shots, shots, shots!!! Surprisingly they were Delicious! We had over 10 to 15 Alumni come out and party with us and it was a GREAT way to start the weekend.

 

Saturday Day - First stop, Michaels to get some items for the Reunion. Second stop,

Lunch with Keesha at The Yardhouse at Paseo Colorado Mall. I was still looking for a purse to match my shoes and a cute bracelet...but no such luck!!! (sad face). Third stop Target - I found a cute purse but it really was not what I was looking for...but it will do for now!

Saturday Night - I go to the Mission Room early to meet our Great Reunions Hostess Sheri who was really cool. DJ Biggy Beats was on the 1s and 2s setting up his area. The producers and camera crew for the filming of Hardwood Dreams 3 Documentary were present and getting ready to film.

Sidebar - My MHS alumni partner in crime Tenisha G. had been communicating with the HD3 producers as they had reached out to her saying they wanted to film the MHS 1993 Basketball Players at the Reunion. A little history...the 1993 MHS men won CIF and State Championships in Basketball in 1992. They were the talk of Inglewood and back then they filmed the first Documentary of Hardwood Dreams highlighting our boys and their goals for the future - college scholarships and/or draft to the NBA. 10 Years Later Hardwood Dreams 2 was filmed but we didn't have our 10 year reunion so we had no idea it happened. 20 years later is the filming of the last installment.

 
Unfortunately, only 3 of the 5 showed up at the Reunion - Sean Harris, Corey Saffold and Dwight Curry. When I say the Life of the Party was Dwight and he really got the party started!! He hasn't changed a bit! We got Turnt Up after that!!! We ate, drank, twerked and had a great time! Lol
 Shout out to THE BEST MHS c/o 93 REUNION COMMITTEE EVER! - Those who worked their asses off - Tenisha Gates, Lashawn Fuller and LaTanya Phillips. Lisa Glymph and her husband couldn't make it to the Reunion due to a prior engagement but Lisa definitely contributed to the planning process. If you fell off at the end and failed to communicate with the clique you gets NO Shout Out !!!  I'm sorry, but if you can't tell... a part of me is bitter because as adults you would think people would be more considerate of others...but it looks like that's "too much like right". Moving on...

For once people showed up right on time - 7pm. Unfortunately, I was walking around with no shoes on because I kept getting distracted with various things that needed to get done. I was finally able to sit down and put on my Monika Chiang heels. It took me at least 15 minutes and I broke a sweat in the process!! But once I put them on you couldn't tell me nothing. I love those shoes...and I wasn't taking them off until they kicked us out the ballroom...no matter how bad my feet hurt, Lol. I forgot to put my Aldo cushions in but that didn't stop me! 

What made my weekend was Monica Chiang herself giving me a SHOUT OUT on Instagram!!

During the discombobulated program that I was allegedly hosting, my trusty sidekick LaTanya (helped saved my ass by tallying up the votes) - for the (Fun?) Reunion Certificates we gave out that night: Just to name a few...My twin Keesha was voted The Best Dressed Alumni - Female, Corey Saffold was voted The Best Dressed Alumni - Male, Lashawn was voted the Alumni That Hasn't Changed A Bit, Phoenix Breaux was voted the Alumni That Changed the Most, Tenisha was voted Alumni with the Best Body 20 Years Later, Edward Turner was voted the Alumni that Traveled the Furthest (hailing from the state of Washington), Kysha Hadley was voted the Alumni that has been Married the Longest and Dwight Curry was voted the Alumni that was Most Unlikely to Come to the Reunion!  We gave out more certificates so Shout out to all the MHS Alumni Winners! 

By the end of the night -

The Filming was Over...

            The Program was done

                        We were Good & Tipsey

                                    Our Feet were Hurting...from dancing

                                                Massive amounts of pictures were taken

                                                            & MHS Alumni c/o 93 were Happy...

I think this Reunion Night turned out to be very Successful !! I'm so glad it's over, Lol.

No more stress...but in the end it was worth it !

Sunday at Memorial Park - Oh you thought I was done??? MHS Alumni packed the blankets, lawn chairs, dominoes, UNO, playing cards, alcohol and snacks for a Day at the Park. The jazz didn't start until 7pm but that didn't stop us from enjoying the beautiful day and relaxing in the sun with our MHS 19Naughty3 T-shirts (thanks Tenisha). Unfortunately Keesha and I had to leave early because we were going to the Jay Z and Justin Timberlake Concert at the Pasadena Rose Bowl.

This was the perfect way to end a Perfect weekend - Legends of the Summer Concert -

JT and HOVA put on a Great Show!! I Loved it!!

 

Me and Kee taking selfies before our Uber ride to the Bowl.

& Me throwin up the deuces with my Target leather sleeve T-shirt that I love (that Kee got me)! "the higher the heel the closer to heaven".

The worst part about this 3 day weekend is that we were away from our Princess - Bailey who had to go to The Pooch Hotel for the weekend (sad face). We missed her tremendously!! But next time we are booking a dog friendly hotel so she can come with us (smiley face)!!!

We Love this Little Dog - Princess Bailey!

 

I can honestly say my Twin Sis and I had a GREAT Reunion Weekend!

Sorry but there were no love connections this weekend so as you know...

The Adventures of Single and Fabulous must go on!

Stay Tuned...Smooches!

           

Random Observations

Hey Beautiful People,

Sisters 4 Life!!!

Although it's been 2 weeks since I returned from The Essence Festival... I have to give you my own personal annoying experience on United Airlines!!! I just can't let it go. I need people to be aware of stupid shit people do on the plane. If this is you...Get It Together!!

#1 - Your seat is way in the back...Don't get up and stand in the aisle once the plane stops and block everyone...where are you going...nowhere...sit down until it's your turn. Have some consideration.

#2 - Don't try and leave the plane before other people who are seated in front of you...that is so annoying...once again sit your ass down and wait your turn. Use your common sense.

Consistently NOT following instructions!

#3 - Taking the seatbelt off while the plane is still moving, Really? You must not care about your safety!

#4 - There are pictures on the overhead compartment on how to stow your bag, to make it easy for you...and the passengers still can't get it right!

The United Airlines flight attendants were useless. There were passengers struggling to put their bags in the overhead bin.  The already existing bags weren't stowed correctly and they didn't even bother to correct them in an effort to fix the problem. Only towards the end did they start helping the passengers. I was extremely disappointed with their lack of customer service.

#5 - Major Pet Peeve - Why you All up in MY space. If I can feel you on my backpack...you just might catch an elbow playing me too close!

#6 - Last but not Least - Asking other passengers to switch seats because you messed up your own seat assignment (not my damn problem).

Like my twin sister says - I need my own private jet because I really don't like People...
No really I don't...Lol, too many people and not enough Common Sense!


On a more positive note I am happy to report that I had a Great 1st Week at my New Job!! Unfortunately, I have the hardest time getting up in the morning...yeah, yeah you already know why...

but I can't complain because I finally got My Life Back and just in time to Celebrate my girl Jackie's "Star" Birthday Friday night @ La Vida Lounge in Hollywood.

Sidebar - Jackie is the one who gave me the nickname "Glamour Girl" when I first started working for LA County and its stuck with me ever since!!!

Truth be told I was debating (with myself, of course) about whether I wanted to go or not...I'm getting old you guys, Lol. I always make big plans to go out and but when it gets down to it I get lazy and I don't want to go through the "glam gyrl process". But I'm so glad I pulled it together because Jackie always has THE BEST Birthday Parties and so I knew deep down I couldn't miss it! As quickly as I talked myself out of going, I talked myself back into going. Helloooo...I don't work nights or weekends anymore and I had a dress in the closet waiting to be worn! There was no reason for me not to go!

Although I was having a Great time with the Birthday Girl & Friends..."Bi*!€h Don't Kill My Vibe" is what I wanted to Yell across the Club when I saw another female (that I happened to know) with my exact same dress on. Now don't get me wrong I am fully aware that this may happen sometimes so I have no problem about being a good sport. Because I knew the girl, I went up to her and tapped her to get her attention, but she reacted like I was the plague and literally ran in the opposite Direction! Really??? Whether we are side by side or located in two different areas in the Club, "we still have on the same dress " and people have already noticed and will point it out to you! All I know is that I bet not run into her ass in the future...I will act like I don't know her...and then watch her face crack!! I can be an Asshole sometimes I just never get the chance to, that often and so I'm looking forward to it! (insert evil laugh, Lol)

Friday night was Fun but Saturday I had to prepare for Sunday's JazzFest West Music Festival. Togo's lunch boxes - check, El Pollo Loco chicken -check, pasta, Hawaiian bread, salad, dessert and fruit - check and Stella Rosa Red Wine and Moscato hidden at the bottom of the cooler - check! The weather was great, no scorching sun or rain. I actually got up at 7am because I went to bed early the night before (you should be proud of me, lol). We arrived to the Festival early and got a great seat right in the middle of all the excitement. I hung with family and friends and had a great relaxing time at the jazz festival.

 

My #1 partner in crime Timi was at the Jazz Festival and as we were conversing she made a very good observation. Timi asked me, "How many guys have tried to talk to you at the festival today?" I told her "not one...but zero"!!! She explained that not one thing had changed about me since we returned from New Orleans...my hair (curly weave :) was the same, I had on a cute dress and my personality is always a friendly demeanor. There were several opportunities when we would pass in front of a group of men and there was no backwards glance, no greeting, nothing! It didn't even occur to me until she said something. See this is the shit I'm talking about when living in L.A.  You would have thought this would have been the perfect opportunity for me to meet someone...but no such luck. I don't get it!!! This is why I always look forward to going to the Essence Festival so much...the men out there show nothin but love for the women!! I really think I need to contemplate moving!!!

Speaking of moving...I've been in contact with my new friend in Germany! Now seeing that we are both Essence veterans you would think that we both are aware of the cardinal rule to the Essence Festival...and that is, once we leave New Orleans there is no more contact with one another. I really did not think that I would talk to him again because he's a continent away, LOL. You never have any high expectations coming away from the Essence Festival because everyone is coming out to do one thing...and that's to have a good time. We are all from different states, we exchange numbers, meet up at the local parties, get to know each other, have a great time and then part our separate ways. Unless there was some kind of love connection...what happens in Essence normally stays in Essence. But surprisingly I got a text message from him which has led to a few email exchanges...Whaaat?? I'm not going to get my hopes up but my younger cousin Jazmine did ask "what's wrong with going to London?" Hmmmm, I do have my passport!!! Baby steps...lets see how the email exchanges go!

In the meantime...since no one has put a ring on it,

it looks like the Adventures of SingleNFabulous Must Go On!
More Jazz Festivals and Fun Events Coming Up!

Stay Tuned Fab Followers...Smooches!!

Turnt Up at the Essence Music Festival

Hey Beautiful People,

Get comfortable this Blog is going to be straight Comedy!

The 19^th Annual Essence Music Festival in New Orleans
from the SingleNFabulous perspective!

(smiley face with a wink)



I don't even know where to start...let me stop lying...YES I DO....it all began on Thursday morning, 4th of July, 2013…

First of all, my ass over slept, smh...my flight was leaving at 9:30am and I was supposed to be up at 6:30am. Needless to say that didn't happen (you guys know I don't do mornings)!  My twin sis had to wake me up to get my butt to LAX right on time! I got through TSA without any issues and I arrived at my departure gate with plenty of time to spare to get coffee and a cinnamon roll.

New Orleans ain't ready for US!

My partner in crime this year to accompany me in my Essence Music Festival shenanigans was "the one and only Timika!" I roll with a small clique because I just find it's much easier to manage and for the most part two people are more likely to be on the same page versus multiple people, personalities and opinions. Did I mention I don’t like a whole lot of people… lol, yeah that’s just ME!

Okay, let me get the formalities out of the way - Overall the weather was warm and humid (not too hot) with random bursts of thunderstorms...don't ask...it's New Orleans which is notorious for unpredictable weather! Thank goodness I checked the forecast before I left LA and was semi-prepared and packed my mini-size umbrella. It didn't help that I left it in the hotel room on the first night it rained, Lol.

Every day I was meeting someone new...which was the best part of the trip. I had my Foxy "Sandy" Brown Curly Weave in and I couldn't keep 'em off me, LMAO. Truthfully I don't know what color my damn hair is as my hair stylist refuses to tell me, well...she may have hinted at it being honey blonde...but idk. I just know she makes me look HOTT every time I walk out the shop!

I splurged a little and got some eyelash extensions at this beauty spa in the South Bay Area specifically for this trip and they came out pretty cool as they looked really natural. It was a good investment and much better than going to the Nail shop and dealing with those amateurs!

My daytime outfits were on point. At first I thought I over-packed but I wore all my dresses and then thought that I should've had 1 or 2 more back-up outfits in case of a wardrobe malfunction...but everything worked itself out. Except, I didn't get to rock my night time Thick Chick clubbin outfits like I thought I would (sad face).

Thursday evening we arrived in New Orleans with no problem. We saw Mary Mary with their husbands and Chef Roble in the airport waiting on car service (must be nice)! We rode the Airport Shuttle to the Astor Crowne Plaza Hotel and quickly checked into our room. I think this hotel is a pretty cool spot for the festival as it sits on the corner of Bourbon and Canal. The "front door" gives you access to the various shopping stores on Canal Street (Footlocker, Nine West Outlet, CVS etc.) and you can visit the lounge bars in the other hotels on the block. The "side door" gives you access to Bourbon Street and all the ratchet activities for the night. Once you go down Bourbon Street be prepared as you are entering the "dark side," Lol (that's a good thing)!

@The Infamous Razzoo's

The Essence Music Festival Adventures of SingleNFabulous went from Thursday to Monday so naturally we walked Bourbon Street and visited the infamous Razzoo Club and Patio several times!
What I can tell you is this...when going to these two places make sure you go early (once at night and once in the daytime) before everyone comes into town on Friday or Saturday. I had fun but as more people came to town the crazier it got and the harder it was to function at either one of these two hot spots! Me and Timi had to check to see if we were pregnant (after being felt up so many times) LOL. We had to squeeze through a sea of men from the front entrance of the club to reach the back patio. Now don't get me wrong it was to be expected but as mentioned before it becomes more and more difficult to have a good time when there are extremely too many people in one spot!

Weekend Highlights –

It’s mandatory that you mix and mingle at the W Hotel in their upstairs bar & lounge. All you need is a DJ on the 1s and 2s and an abundance of handsome men buying drinks! You can go to the W in the daytime or at night time and they will always get it crackin!



Rockin our All White Gear!

We then made our way to the 15th Annual All White Party at Metropolitan Nightclub "Cause We Like to Partaaaaaaaaaaaay!" Just our luck...we met some cool women that got us past the wait in line and went straight to the upstairs VIP section. General Admission was a zoo but it was still FUN to socialize with everyone. The comedian Kevin Hart made an appearance to get the party Turnt Up!(he's the little man in the middle with a black shirt and sunglasses on - right below, lol). It was a very big venue and able to accommodate a lot of people. If you got there too late you were "assed out" - No Entry for You!

 

Kevin Hart in the Building!

After shutting down the white party we finally made it to our Friday Night Concert at the Mercedes Benz Louisiana Superdome. The artist line-up was great and consisted of Brandy, LL Cool J, Jill Scott and Maxwell. We were on CP time and the impromptu rainstorm earlier in the day prevented us from arriving on time to see Brandy perform. I've seen Jill Scott and Maxwell in concert several times. I really just wanted to see LL Cool J since he is a Rap ICON and I've never seen him in concert before. I was very happy when I found out one of my favorite soul singer's Anthony David was performing in one of the Super Lounges so I was able to get away and groove with him in between the main stage acts.

Concert Floor Seats @ The Superdome

Essence is always packed with so many cool people from The East Coast, West Coast, Dirty South and Midwest. I had plenty of girl friends that were going to be in New Orleans doing their thing and I knew we were bound to run into each other. Shout out - Although I didn't get to see my friend April and her husband (and we were staying in the same hotel)...I did run into my girl Kashawndra and her friends at Mother's restaurant! I also ran into my friend Tamanika in front of the Astor Crowne on the last day of activities.



Oh I almost forgot....me and Timi made a new friend...Miss Jamala from Oakland. We met her by accident while waiting on a taxi and ended up hanging out together. You know I don’t like random people… lmao, but she was a cool girl so I guess it was meant to be! I have to say that girl is a "pro" at taking "selfies" with her camera phone, Lol.

 

Me and Jamala

 The BEST part of the trip -
(in my Salt n Pepa voice)

"What's my weakness?... MEN!"

 

For whatever reason we met a lot of guys hailing from the East Coast and they were real Cool ! However, the one downfall was that they were very "clingy". Okay let me break it down...
At the Essence Festival EVERYONE is Single, Lol. But you have to be careful because men have their own agenda and women have theirs too. Unfortunately there are several "married men" and "single desperate men" looking to hook up!! Then you have my dilemma...the single men looking to "wife you up after meeting you in one night" Really??

This is the Essence Festival!!!!!

The main purpose is to meet new people and have a good time...not to make any "love connections" unless they live in the same area as you or you are willing to commit to a long distance relationship. I just kept attracting the clingy men that wanted to kick it "alllllll the tiiiiiiiiiiime" and of course those were the ones I wasn't interested in. I had to tell them "Sheda is a Free Agent" and then try to figure out who was worthy of my time! Believe me this only happens at Essence...me being torn between so many men. Now I'm not complaining...I'm just saying (smiley face)! Consequently...I can't get not one man to fight over my time or affection in L.A., that's a damn shame!

HOWEVER, there was this one guy I saw "sitting alone" in IHOP who was simply Gorgeous...he had so much New York Swag I just couldn't resist. He was at least 6 feet tall, ripped arms, New York Knicks hat on with a basketball Jersey reppin Brooklyn. I just had to meet him!! Timi had my back and we were formulating a plan on how she was going to approach him so she could introduce me to him...because I couldn't bring myself to do it on my own. Timi was ready to make it happen but in just a short amount of time his food came to the table and I just knew it would be rude to try and talk to him at that point. So of course I became discouraged ...but I just couldn’t let it go. So I had to get creative and I decided to take matters into my own hands. I asked the hostess for a pen and paper and wrote him a note explaining that I didn't want to be rude and interrupt his breakfast but if he was interested in hanging out during the Essence Festival weekend I gave him my phone number and told him to call me. I went to his table, introduced myself, slid the piece of paper to him, he greeted me and I left. It was out of my hands at that point.

Loungin

In 5-10 min. flat I received a text message from him (damn I'm good, Lol). I found out he was in the service and stationed in Germany. He was on vacation and meeting his boys at the Essence Festival who were flying in later on that night. In addition, he expressed interest in meeting up later to hang out with me. Long story short I had several different opportunities to hang out with him over the weekend...no clingy shit...just a real cool vibe. I learned all kinds of interesting things about him. He's a younga man (early 30's), he has a great personality, a good sense of humor, a good paying job/career in the service, he loves R&B and Hip Hop music and he's just a well-rounded person with a 6 pack of ABS to die for...and how do I know this you ask??...He had his shirt off when we were sitting by the hotel pool having a conversation (get your mind out of the gutta, lmao)!!! Oh did I mention he was WHITE!!!!! Yeah pick your jaw up off the floor...that was one Fine Ass white boy!

I tell you Fab Followers “I don't discriminate” I just need my MATE to be my best friend and It's All Good. Too bad this one has to go back to Germany. I feel like playing my favorite song (on repeat) "You Can't Win" by Michael Jackson off The Wiz Soundtrack (sad face).  I met plenty of guys this past weekend but this was the only one that I made a cool connection with and of course he has to be stationed in another country... talk about Long Distance!

Well Essence was FUN but it's over now and I must return to the Real World!

I had a great time, enjoyed great company, ate some great food and partied my bougie butt off !!! If you haven't attended the Essence Music Festival

you need to plan to go at least once...Mandatory!!

I can honestly say this experience alone gives me Faith that there are A few good men left…but is possible my soul mate may not reside in Cali...

Looks like I need to get out and travel some more.

Timika says we need to go to Aruba next…Sounds like a Plan!!!

Stay Tuned...The Adventures of SingleNFabulous must continue since there were

No Love Connections in New Orleans (sad face)!
Smooches