When You Least Expect It

Hi Beautiful People,

He and I have History and we have known each other for 5 years. When we first met the relationship was "intense" with no parameters in place...not the best way to start out... when you are looking for a monogomous relationship (me) but because (he) was not ready to settle down yet (this was my perception) as a result we ended up going our separate ways.

It recently started with a random phone call from him out of nowhere. Communication between us has never been a problem. We've both been honest with each other since day 1. No one misled the other and we've always been cool.

That one random act has progressed to casual conversation and one night led to an improptu meeting after the Long Beach Jazz Festival. I enjoyed every minute of it!

We've seen each other in passing conveniently at public events and have always made empty promises to hang out. We've never lost contact...we just pick up where we left off.

One Sunday night I get an invitation to dinner.  I don't know how long its been since I went on an actual date. It was fun and relaxing. We reminisced about the old memories from when we first met and conversed about the new things that had changed in our lives. Sounds like someone has matured and been through some rough times in his own past relationships. But now he is interested in something more stable and drama free. (In my mind - Well then...I'm Your Girl :) I'm interested in dating this man but I'm cautious about what I'm signing up for.

We've hung out at the house just relaxing and he's assured me there is no pressure this time around. I think we've both grown patient and it appears he is not in a hurry to make any more mistakes but is eager to show that he has good intentions... I'm impressed.

There was a second date and we went out to dinner again and an after party...I had a great time. I can get use to this ;)

To Be Continued....Smooches!

Don't take your Mental Health for Granted...

Hi Beautiful People,

I wrote this Blog at 7am because I couldn't sleep. I've recently come to the realization that you are only a victim as long as you choose to be (this does not apply to all situations, i.e. domestic violence, criminal acts, etc.) If you have control over your life and can make decisions for yourself then you have all the POWER to do what is best for you.

Happy Birthday Taunya!

Too often do we put the needs of ourselves on the back burner and put the needs of others first. This can easily be relevant in our day to day work environment, personal relationships and interactions with family and friends. But what we don't realize is that if YOU are not healthy-mentally, emotionally or physically - you are in no position to HELP anyone else!

Reflecting back on Me - I think it's safe to say that I've always consider myself a strong person. My mom and dad have always taught me to say what's on my mind (respectfully), fight for my rights (personal and political), try not to let anyone take advantage of me and take care of myself first. Well these principles are not always easy to live by.

It came to a point where I was very unhappy in my day to day life and it began to take a toll on me emotionally and physically. When my sisters said "We need an Intervention for Resheda" I knew I had a problem, Lol. At this point I knew I had let things get out of my control. So now I've decided to be proactive rather than reactive. It is very easy to complain about something but if you fail to do anything about it you are just as guilty of allowing yourself to continue in that situation.

If you want something you have to pursue it (short of stalking someone...ppl).
If you have dreams you need to do the research on how to achieve it.
If you have a goal (short or long term) you need to figure out how to reach it.

I've always known that nothing is ever handed to us and "with no struggle, there is no progress", however I recently learned that if we continue to be "content" in our current situation it will continue to be that....our only option.

I finally became tired of being taken advantage of and have come to the conclusion that if I'm going to make things happen in my life I have to be assertive and do it MY WAY, lol.

I tried it your way and that shit ain't working for me anymore! Good advice from a Good friend (thanks Taunya) I'm doing what's in the best interest of ME and I'm doing it Stress Free!

So now I have this rare opportunity to get the ball rolling on my own personal projects in a short amount of "stress free time" that has been given to me...and I thank The Lord that he's given me this opportunity....as I believe everything happens for a reason.

So let the Games begin....No Excuses!

SingleNFabulous is STILL Single...and on a New Mission

P.S. - My latest Adventures have included local Sports Bar, Sunday Brunch, Church, The Taste of Soul, Taunya's 40th Birthday Party and still no such luck in the Dating Department... Although there might be this 1 particular guy with potential in my future....To Be Continued.... :)

Family First !

Hi Beautiful People,

I am happy to report that I am enjoying my singlenfabulous life because I have no other choice, Lol. I'm loving my life and my family and that is enough for me right now.

I had a great time this weekend. It was mandatory that I take a day off of work to enjoy my puppy's 1st Birthday party.

 

Of course I ended up working the weekend anyway...are you surprised?!!! It was too much like right for me to think that I would actually get a "weekend off", SMDH. What can I say, I made the best of my weekend and had a great time!

 

 

Saturday morning I was up bright and early running errands and picking up last minute items for Bailey's Birthday Party at the Zoom Room in Culver City. I know this is not typical of any puppy parent but if you know me you know I have no children and Bailey is my "puppy child" :) I LOVE that little doggie! So of course my sister and I had to celebrate her 1st Birthday in style!

 

 

Birthday venue - check,

            Invitations mailed to Our friends and their doggies- check

                        iTunes playlist by Auntie Keesha - check,

                                    Bailey's yellow "Chewnel" tutu outfit - check,

                                                Mommy and Auntie matching outfits - check

                                                            Bailey having fun with her doggie friends -                                                                                                        PRICELESS!! 

I'd like to thank all of our closest friends - Meagan, Kirk and Nola; Keisha, Zoe, Zara and Cocoa (Bailey's sister); Caroline and Cassie and Bailey's favorite Uncle's Bruce & Davion - for coming out and bringing their dogs to enjoy the coolest puppy play date EVER :) planned by Yours Truly - Me!

 

Sunday morning the plan was to go to the LA County Fair with my younger sister and niece, however after all the puppy shenanigans from the night before I over slept. Thank goodness my sister texts me and says its going to be 102 degrees in Pomona and we are going to die a slow and horrible death in the sun if we go early, lol, so we changed our plans. A late Brunch at The Strand House in Manhattan beach, make sure we pick up my brother-in-law and then hit the LA County Fair "after-hours" when the sun isn't beaming down on us.

 

 

We had a blast! We played lots of games, won stuffed animals, ate delicious cheeseburgers and bought a whole bunch of stuff at the shopping centers. We can't wait to go back before it ends!!! 

 

 

 

 

 

No new prospects in the dating department as of yet so I continue to "do me" and try to have as much fun as possible when I have free time! 

The Adventures of SinglenFabulous must go on...Smooches!

My Summer has been Fifty Shades Funner, LOL

Hi Beautiful People,

I am very proud to say that I've been able to take advantage of what free time I have to get out and socialize. I've been to Jazz Fest West in San Dimas, Washington, D.C. for my Family Reunion, Long Beach Jazz Festival and the Gardena Jazz Festival.

I met an LAPD Officer at the Long Beach Jazz Festival but I won't hold my breathe. We've sent text messages but I have yet to receive a phone call and I made it clear that we need to have a conversation and he agreed. But I've yet to receive a phone call......Really?

I learned my lesson from the past and what I won't do is "chase a man". If there is one thing I do know it's that if a man is interested in you he will make an effort to call you, spend time with you and clear his schedule for you."

 

It doesn't help that my current Summer Read is: The Fifty Shades of Grey Series - Fifty Shades Freed :p, As freaky as that book is I understand why women are drawn to it. There is romance, hot steamy sex, chivalry, communication, courtship and unconditioinal love throughout this trilogy.

I've come to the conclusion that I am a hopeless romantic and I would love to meet someone who is even remotely close to being fun, spontaneous, over protective and romantic like the main character in this  book. But I'm having trouble just meeting a "normal" guy. I've come to the conclusion that online dating is not for me. I just have to wait and be patient and HAVE FUN in the meantime!

 

I already have a plan for 2013 and it's as Selfish as they come, LOL. I've determined that since I am "Single" I am going to enjoy every minute of it until I am "Single No More"! I have planned as many 2013 activities as my pocket book can afford ;). My main goal right now is to focus on searching for a new path in my career that will enable me to make my own schedule. I believe a transformation is coming soon and this Blog is going to help me document. I'm also glad I have my SingleNFabulous followers to support me through it!

Until next time...the Adventures of SingleNFabulous continue...Smooches

You Never Know Until You Try!

Hey Beautiful People,

Throwback pic with my short cut!

Okay so I am officially irritated with the alleged “potentials”I met on Match.com and the market of men advertised on there.

Initially I was motivated -
It started with this one guy where we corresponded back and forth and I text him one weekend to ask him how he was doing and he responded. I wasn’t trying to hold a conversation but being thoughtful. I got one response, I then text him another question but did not get a response and then nothing after that. He could have called me because he had my number at that point or he could have asked me not to text him but to call him instead and I would have been fine with that…everyone has their preference but Nothing???? I haven’t heard from him since. Was that not an invitation once I text him? He now has my number?! Must I spell it out. I’m not completely done with him and I guess I can email him and ask him what his preference is but I don’t feel I’m the one who should contact him as I initiated the conversation outside of the emails. I will keep you posted on my decision…

Then there is this other guy. He does nothing but text me??? I had to check him because he kept texting me 4 times in the same day “a random hello, hope your day is good, hi, happy face…etc. Mind you I had a busy day and did not have time to respond but he’s still texting me. I had to let him know that texting me at 7am is not the business and if I don’t respond to the first text don’t send me 3 more…assume I’m busy! To cushion the “blow” because I know I can be “blunt at times” :)  I invited him to call me so we can have a “live phone conversation” but no he’s still texting me. And guys wonder why this is a turn off!!! On top of that when I respond to his text it feels like he’s not even reading it because he then sends another text (same day or on another day) saying some other random thought. He has yet to get on the phone and have a “real” conversation with me. I’m in my right mind to stop texting him all together and see if he picks up the phone to TALK. If not, it’s his LOSS!

The other guy that lives in Compton, has a cool job and had good conversation and seemed interested.... I gave him my phone number and he hasn’t called. Really? What was the point to us conversing via email if there is no “follow through”. I thought I was not suppose to be the assertive one in this case??? Lord I am too through. I feel like this is a waste of time and money!

My friend already told me I need to be on Plenty of Phish (it’s Free). If I’m paying for a Matchmaking Site and I’m not getting any decent men that are willing to step up I will have to save my money and venture back to my old school principals “meet your crazy butt live and in-person”and least then I can cut through the bull shit quickly! August is my last month on Match.com. some things better change or I will have to invest my money elsewhere (like a new pair of shoes)!

The Adventures of SingleNFabulous MUST go on....Smooches!

Online Dating...Why Not?!

OMG! Beautiful people,  I have to update you on my dating life!

My Black is Beautiful !

So I took a chance (on an unknown kid, lol - Clueless) and created my profile on Match.com. I left my options open as far as race and gave myself a 50 mile radius (because you and me both know I haven't had any luck within my neighboring cities). I've been getting matches in the city of Encino, Walnut, Sherman Oaks, Torrance, Compton, etc. These guys appear to be cool and I can decide on who I want to email based on how they describe themselves on their profile picture. You know I can spot a crazy a mile away!

I recently began corresponding with this 1 guy (retired fireman) and his profile information is right on point with what I'm looking for...however I need to have a few more conversations with him so I can get details on his expectations of a woman... so naturally you know I'm going to keep you posted :) I'm also not going to let this 1 guy be my only prospect...mama's on the prowl and always keeping my options open.

On the way back from D.C. I get another email from another match.com prospect. Only downfall right now is that he's 30 years old. I think I put my preference as 35 and older. You know I'm young at heart....but I ain't no cougar, Lol. He left his phone number and expressed his interest. It looks like we will have to have a conversation when I get back in town. Let me see what he's working with and/or have to offer and I will get back to you guys with an update.

Looks like I'm popular. Awwww wait a minute! I got an email from a brotha in Compton. He already told me he is gainfully employed and has been on the job for over 6 years. He enjoys outside activities, traveling, having a good time and companionship. He doesn't sound bad at all.

L.A. meets D.C.

Okay, so I went to No prospects... to talking to three guys right now, get em Sheda, Lol. I've been conversing (that's how you say that people - conversate is not a word, lol) with these gentlemen via email and the conversation has been pretty cool so far. Now I just have to figure out when is the right time to meet them in person (in a public place of course ;). You guys know that I don't have the best work schedule but I'm going to have to figure something out. Starbucks meet and greet, Lunch date and/or Taco Tuesday Happy Hour. This way I'm not wasting my time or their money, Lol.
By the next Blog I should have met at least one or two of these guys in person and I can give you the skinny on how the initial first impression went down. Remember what happened last time (Blog 4/4/11)...I refuse to give anybody a ride home...Again...that's just out the damn question!

Until next time...The Adventures of SingleNFabulous Continue...Smooches

My Family Reunion on the East Coast - Washington, D.C. baby!

Good morning Beautiful People,

It is officially July 6th, 2012 at 7:01 am and I am sleepy! Just got off the plane traveling from LAX to Detroit, Michigan. I took a Red-eye and I have a 4 hour layover (lucky me) so I'm sitting at Max & Erma's for Breakfast. Detroit's airport is pretty cool as it has a tram overhead that takes you from one terminal to the next, a few cool shops are open for you to spend all your money before you even start your vacation and there are actually a lot of options in your choice of eateries. Overall, I'm just grateful I found a place I can sit comfortably and eat something other than Starbucks or Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf...I was able to get some real food that isn't overpriced :)

For those of you who don't know, I always have an annual trip planned to forcefully give myself a vacation which becomes inevitable and necessary to my mental health. One year I get to wild-out and go to the Essence Festival and then the following year my family chooses to host a family reunion in different states. As you can see, it is the year of the Family Reunion and Washington, D. C. is the spot to be at. This will be my 2nd time in D. C. ...1st time was at a Howard University Graduation years ago. Seeing that I'm really not familiar with the East Coast and I won't have a lot of time to venture out and explore the neighboring states such as New York... I have officially decided to plan a New York trip in 2013. There are so many things to do, people to see and places to shop that I will probably need to be there at least a week ;)

My Family Time in Washington, D.C. was truly Priceless!


Friday night -
Family met at the Cafe downstairs at the " Meet and Greet" to receive our weekend reunion information and I fell in love with our patriotic family T-shirts :). The day ended with dinner at Maggiano's with myself, my adult cousin and her daughter and my Aunt and Uncle. Dinner was delicious (especially the crab cakes) and we took enough food back to the hotel to eat for 2 days. I highly recommend this restaurant and I believe we have one located at The Grove in LA :) Sad to say that I did not get to go out and experience the D. C. nightlife as my twin was not able to make it to the Reunion :( and my adult cousin had her daughter with her so I didn't have a partner in crime to hang with me. There was no way I was going to brave the D.C. streets by myself with no knowledge of where the hell I was going. I guess it worked itself out because I needed to go to bed due to the 3 hour time change and I knew I was expected to get up early the next day.

Saturday Day - The 1/2 Day D.C. tour was GREAT!
Bright eye and Bushy Tailed...I am not a Morning person, LOL...Coffee was mandatory! My family of approximately 30 people boarded an air conditioned chartered bus and got a tour of our nations Capital. My Flip video came in handy when we were at the Lincoln Memorial as it was very historical and breathtaking to see history right in front of me. My "paparazzi" Nikon camera...that I love soooo much...came in handy for the Walk-Patterson daytime activities such as the family photo at the White House, pictures of The Capitol and pictures of the New! Martin Luther King, Jr. Memorial.

Saturday night - I was Beat up from touring in the 105 degree heat and I thought I was going to take a nap in my hotel room but that didn't happen. Loehman's, TJ Maxx, Nordstrom's Rack were calling my name :) and seeing as they were in walking distance...how could I say no :). After not spending any money because nothing caught my eye it was time for dinner at Georgia Brown's soul food restaurant. It turned out to be a very nice place with live jazz music, beautiful ambiance, delicious food and great customer service. Our party of 9 ate, drank and was merry, Lol. I was happy that I was able to get out and experience some form of night life seeing that I didn't get the chance to really go out and enjoy a Lounge. Oh did I tell you we took the underground Metro blue and orange lines to get there. That was fun and very convenient. I haven't even taken the Metro in L.A. (note- something to do when I get back home).

Sunday Banquet - Fellowship with family. This is the last day of the reunion and it was time for us to part ways. Brunch was delicious and we took lots of family photos. The family agreed the next Family Reunion would be hosted in Las Vegas in 2014. I'm so excited and I can't wait to plan this Reunion because we have to make it happen because we Reppin the West Coast!

Well beautiful people, no love connections in D.C. but that's okay because I have another plan brewing as I type.

Until next time...The Adventures of SingleNFabulous Continue...Smooches