Summer's Coming...

Hi Beautiful People,

I've been M.I.A. again... I know, I know.... my bad, Lol. But I really haven't been doing anything exciting...until NOW :) 

Unfortunately my life has not been that interesting these past few weeks but that's not my fault I just haven't had any Hot Spots to go to! My Birthday was in March and my sister and I normally do something EPIC but this year we decided to lay low and just go out to eat. We ate Breakfast at Schooner or Later, Lunch at The Strand House and Dinner at The Terranea. 

In the meantime, I've just been working and trying to come up with a full proof plan on...How I can take over the world!!!!!!! LOL.

Anywhoo, the summer is coming and I will definitely be planning more weekend shenanigans with my girls because a sista is STILL SINGLE! Smh

The good news is....I've had a few opportunities to go out and mix & mingle with some cool peeps.

My sister was doing the make-up for the bride at a wedding and I was her plus 1 guest (smile). It was a beautiful wedding and I had a good time. There were some nice looking guys but no potentials :( more couples with kids then single men, Oh well...

Last weekend, I found out there was a Kiss N Grind "Day Party" at the Sofitel and two of my girl friends were down to go. Hot damn, I'm finally going out. Sadly it was the weekend that Prince passed away and they did a tribute and played all his songs. We had the best time! There was a lot of people in attendance and the place got packed real quick. We sat down and ate appetizers and perused through the crowd of people.  I was worried about my outfit and whether I was going to be cute and comfortable. But apparently there was NO dress code because we saw a lot of women wearing some outfits that were just unacceptable. I'm going to need these women to get some "real" friends that's going to tell them what outfit is flattering to their figure and not just let them walk out the house looking crazy! 

But I digress, everyone was having a good time and it was a good environment to be in. A great crowd of people, good music, good food, wine and some nice "eye candy" to look at, but no personal connections with any one guy in particular (sad face). A room full of men and I gets No Love, WTH does a girl have to do???

The Adventures of SingleNFabulous 

Must Go On!

Smooches

2016 Super Bowl Weekend ~ Panther's Fan for a Day

Hey Beautiful People,

Forgive me for this delayed blog post but I’ve been trying to finish this post for weeks now and life just got in the way! I’m currently in Hawaii (for work) and I finally found some down time to type the final details of this blog post. And I only have the time to do it now because I’m 2 hours behind California, so I’m loving this extra time I get to take advantage of!

The good news is: You'd be very proud of me because I went out twice during Super bowl weekend. However, it was very INTERESTING to say the least…So just sit back and relax and just hear the words that are coming out of my mouth. Lol

Let's start with Saturday...unfortunately I was hit with a migraine first thing in the morning. So I was down for the count for the first few hours of the day. I had to take some medication and wait for it to kick in so I would feel better. Around 2pm I was back to my normal bubbly energetic self. I threw on my cute outfit, did my make-up and text my girl Rhonda and told her to meet me at Xen Lounge for our 4pm reservation for their Saturday #RNBrunch. Apparently when Rhonda got there first she was right on time to watch them set up the stage and deliver the ice. Uh Whaaaat? We wanted to be "fashionably late" not the first one's in the door!!! (I thought this event started at 3pm, I'm confused…you know black folks!). I arrived about 15 minutes later and a few more people had arrived. 

Rhonda had already warned me that the men looked "suspect"...uh what does that mean??? I knew exactly what she meant when I walked in the door (wait for it….lol). But we wanted to give this event the benefit of the doubt so we waited for more people to arrive. As mentioned before, black folks don't ever start on time. So we ordered some appetizers and watched as the artists performed their sound checks, smh. We had great seats, thanks to the promoter Brandon Anthony, with a good view of the stage to see the "live music performances". 3 drinks and 3 appetizers later it was 6:30pm and finally show time! The singers who graced the stage were pretty good. It was real cool to hear talented people sing "covers" of our favorite songs. As the place got packed with more people Rhonda and I realized we were probably 2 of the only STRAIGHT women in the Room, wait whaaaaaat?? We definitely wanted the men to outnumber us but not by an abundance of GAY Men! Lol, Awww Damn. No one gave us a heads up what the crowd was going to be like! I should have known when Milan from Love & Hip Hop Hollywood walked in the door and new everybody in the place! Did we make lots of friends YAAAAAASSSSS because everyone was really friendly and cool to talk to. But were we going to find our "future husband" in this crowd, Ummm I think NOT! Overall, we still had a good time eating, drinking and listening to good music. On any other given Saturday night we might have been stuck in the house doing absolutely nothing. At least we tried…but the waitress told us to come back on a Friday night! The next time I go I’m going to definitely invite my favorite Hifey couple Bruce & Davion so we can go out together and enjoy the Live Music!

Now let's talk about Superbowl Sunday...I was definitely hoping it would be better than Saturday's Unexpected Adventures!

After consulting with Brian my "dating advisor?" We narrowed down my choice in venues to water the game down to Pink Taco in Century City and Rush Street in Culver City. We discussed these two options and agreed that Rush Street should have a diverse crowd of people since it's located in Culver City.

So I made reservations for 2:30pm to go to Rush Street. My twin sister Keesha was super excited because her team The Carolina Panthers were playing in the Super Bowl. She was ready to go! Panthers t-shirt (check), Cam Newton #1 Jersey (check), face beat and hair on fleek (check). We settled into our seats and had the best waitress in the joint "Murray". To make things even better it was Keesha's "cheat day" Lol. The menu was on point: up first chips and guacamole, then we feasted on chili cheese tater tots, and angus beef sliders.

Before the game came on there were two guys sitting next to us and it was clear they had already been drinking as they were really talkative and crackin' jokes. But one of them almost knocked my drink over when he got up from his table. The Good News is that the second round of drinks were on HIM (instead of me, lol). Please note 4 martini's in the picture, OH Yeah, We were LIT!!!

We got through the first half of the game but tension was high. We witnessed some great passes but then Cam became the victim of some unforeseen sacks. We weren't prepared to watch the Panthers suffer at the hands of the Bronco's offensive team.

As we continued to support the Panthers we contemplated ordering pizza the second half of the game but it turned out that neither one of us were hungry.

Sidebar - both of us have been on this healthy kick and have been supporting each other through this difficult time of resisting temptation. But the fact that we have at least one "cheat meal" on the weekend gives us something to look forward to and helps us stay on track during the week. We've noticed that we get full quicker and we don't need to eat as much as we've eaten in the past.

We decided to order coffee and a dessert instead. It was delicious and we didn't finish that either.

Sadly the Panthers lost the Super Bowl and that is okay, it just wasn’t their time yet. However, Cam was voted MVP and he had a great season overall. Next year it's on and crackin' hopefully my NY Jets can make it to the Super Bowl so I can root for my own team!

Unfortunately we didn't meet any cute guys but we had a good time regardless. We were in good company with a lot of friendly people who came buy to show their love because Keesha represented her team from beginning to the sad end. As a DIE HARD FAN is suppose to do! Nice Outing but no Love this time around.

This just gives me a good excuse to keep my eyes and ears open for some great “L.A. hot spots” to go hangout and meet new people. Hey if anyone has any suggestions please let me know! It’s going to take a Village to Marry my Ass off to the next eligible bachelor, Lol.

As if you didn't know…Stay Tuned

The Adventures of SingleNFabulous Must Go On!

Smooches!

The Verdict Is in...

Hey Beautiful People,

So I finally went out with the guy that I met online. Honestly, I was dreading it. Part of me had already made my mind up that this guy was not my type.

Recap - When we were sending messages to each other through the online dating website he sounded cool. His profile picture was decent. I gave him my phone number and he called. The initial conversation was a little awkward but it ended okay. Every day thereafter he would text me. That shit got annoying. I wanted to respond and say “I’m working, leave me the hell alone!!” but I knew that would be rude. So I just stopped responding (I know…that’s rude too. But in my mind it’s less abrasive). I knew he’d get the picture. Although we missed meeting each other the first time around, I promptly rescheduled the meeting for Friday evening. I really just wanted to get it over with.

So here I am trying to figure out how to go out on a Friday night in my Uggs without giving the impression that I don’t care. Well I put a little more effort into it and threw on my Fergie ankle boots and I pulled off a quick casual look. Our original plan was to go to Mixology by the Grove but I thought the location was too far for me to get to on a Friday night in traffic after work. I needed a neutral place midway between the Grove and South Bay. So after consulting my “dating advisor” Brian (aka my co-worker)…

Sidebar – Who by the way told me not to go out with this guy because I already knew I didn’t like him and I was wasting my time. But I thought I owed it to him to at least give him a shot since I went as far as to give him my number.

…So Brian suggested I pick a spot at L.A. Live. I agreed that was a good idea. I decided that Rock N Fish would be a cool spot since I’ve been there before and it was nice and quiet. What I didn’t know is that the Lakers were playing at the Staples Center that night! Really?? We both were running late due to traffic. I got there first and reserved a table and he came in soon after. This place was packed. Apparently everyone was there to eat dinner before going to the game. Half way through our “date” everyone dispersed and the place became much quieter.

 

We were seated and my “assessment” began, Lol. He was cool but I wasn’t impressed with his gear (clothing or shoes). It’s a “first date”, first impressions are very important. But he did smell good so he gets points for that. The conversation was much better in person and it flowed. But I could do without him talking with his mouthful and small pieces of food flying across the table. There were also times throughout the conversation when he complimented me that I felt like he was trying too hard and was a little too eager to impress me. I guess I can contribute this nervousness (so he gets a pass). Overall, the best way I could describe this date is that “it was cool”. I felt comfortable during the date but nothing stood out for me. Man with a career, makes good money in his industry, lives alone and has one child/teen.

There was only one problem…I was not attracted to him! I knew this in advance but I was hoping that if I at least went out with him my feelings might change? Uh…No. I think I just made myself feel better because I at least gave him the opportunity to meet me in person instead of just judging him based off of very little information. Unfortunately because I’m not attracted to him I’m not going to waste his time or mines.

I know what I like... I’ve met guys in the past who have met my criteria and that’s how I know my standards aren’t too high (I just wasn’t “the One” for them). So lets be clear. I don’t just want a “nice guy” I want a guy who does it for me…I need up, down and around, even sideways (wink)!

You know…when he keeps you on the phone past your bedtime; when he texts you and you smile (and its not annoying); when he randomly pops into your thoughts throughout the day; or when you look forward to seeing him “any place, any time!” I normally don’t do this but uh…..Lol.

So I had to let him down gently!! He was workin’ my nerves and I needed to be honest with him. I’m sure he was disappointed (I could hear it in his voice) but I’d rather rip the band-aid off quickly then do like some women do and use him for what he can do for me! Not my style….

Looks like SingleNFab is still on a mission and I just have to keep going out so I can run into a man I really like…by complete accident (or so he thinks).

I’m going to focus my energy on my next Adventure

And that’s finding the Best Super Bowl Party In town????

 Let Me know if you have any Idea’s…..

Stay tuned...The Adventures of SingleNFabulous Must Go On!

Smooches

Trust Your Gut

Hi Beautiful People,

I am happy to report that 2016 has gotten off to a good start for me:
*I made my Vision Board
*I made My Goals Plan
*I bought 2 books to increase my knowledge and help keep me motivated and accountable.
*...and I'm doing a 30 Day Detox plan by JJ Smith that is educating me on how to eat healthier, the benefits of Green Smoothies and breaks down what supplements to take that is good for the body.

Anywho...Lets get to the good stuff...

This past 3 day weekend was in celebration of  Martin Luther King, Jr. and it just so happened that I made plans to go out Friday and Sunday, so I could get out to Mix & Mingle.

2 Guys & A Girl...Out on Friday night.
The original plan was to meet some friends at an HBCU Social Event at H.O.M.E. Restaurant but my guy friends gave me a heads up that the crowd was "too young" and it was too crowded. I should have known... So the guys made the executive decision to find another local hangout spot nearby. I was in it to win it, hair done, make up done and cute!

My first thought when writing this blog was, in hindsight, I should have snap chatted (singlenfabla)some of my Friday night adventures but #1- I forgot (because I was having such a good time!) and #2- our destination ended up being a more intimate setting than originally planned Nic's Beverly Hills. Also, I wanted to be respectful of the men who were accompanying me for the night. I believe there is a time and a place for everything and this setting just wasn't the appropriate place for it. Also, I don't want to get to the point where I'm so consumed in putting everything on social media that I don't enjoy myself or the people I'm with.

While hanging out with 2 "great guys" (one married, one single) they gave me great advice and suggestions on what I should do differently when in pursuit of "the One"! I learned that my social circle needs to expand, I need to get out more and be more strategic on when I make plans to go somewhere. Reflect on what my purpose is...and what drives me?! Take the time to volunteer and give back to a cause that I have a passion for. As these things fall into place eventually I will meet someone! And when I do meet someone I must define my relationship with them. Are we just friends, dating or exclusive?? No grey areas I'm too old for that shit (been there done that)! Great conversation with Great people will always be PRICELESS!

I had a good time hanging out with the guys, as they were very respectful and chivalrous in my

presence. The closest I got to meeting someone that night was a "sugar daddy" named R.E. Martin (cool white guy) from New York who kept me laughing and "clutching my pearls" with his crass humor. If you don't know what "crass" means look it up, LOL.

Saturday was cool and I focused on running my errands and having a relaxing day.

Sunday Day Party @ Tiffany's On Vine

I saw a last minute post of a friend of mine having her Birthday Celebration at this venue on Sunday. So I called my girl Rhonda because we had just talked about hanging out together so we could catch up on whose personal life sucks the worst, lol (I think I won). So we met up at the day party, gave Jamara some Birthday love and we hung out at the bar. This venue seemed like a pretty cool spot but what we didn't know is that the real fun didn't start until the sun set (we arrived at about 3pm) but we know better for next time! Unfortunately we didn't see a whole lot of "eye candy" and we didn't get a chance to strike up a conversation with any interesting guys. So we left around 6pm, but not before somebodies "uncle" sent Rhonda a drink at the bar! (insert emoji with the eyes wide open, lol) It was a nice gesture but he was out of place and wasn't exactly in our age category. Rhonda was polite and acknowledged him and then we disappeared quick fast and in a hurry. Honestly we were just happy to get out the house and hang out for a couple of hours. The DJ was real cool though and I think we will plan to go back to check it out again in a few weeks! But right now our mission is to find some other popular places we can go to see what shenanigans we can get ourselves into!

Now technically I was off on Monday because of the Holiday and I sort of made plans to meet this guy I met online later that evening.

Rewind - About 2 weeks ago I signed up for online dating on the OKcupid website on a whim because one of my co-workers told me that they match you based on the questions you answer. So that actually sounded appealing to me because I wanted to weed through the ones that weren't compatible. What I didn't know is that those fools who don't even match the criteria I specified were still going to attempt to make contact with me even though they weren't in the 80% percentile. Well I met one guy that appeared to have a good job, his own place, Lakers and 49ers fan (he gets a pass on the football team), and one child (teenager). I looked at his pictures and he was "aight". He messaged me online and we had a decent conversation. So I told myself give him a chance and give him the number and see if he's as cool on the phone as he is when typing a message. Uhhhh Not So Much! The conversation was like playing 20 Questions and it felt forced. Unfortunately I could tell over the phone he had no "SWAG"! So now I'm annoyed.

I knew I should have "trusted my gut" and stuck to what I know and like and that's meeting people in person! The purpose is to figure out if there is any instant chemistry, does the conversation just flow, are we compatible. I get none of these vibes from this man over the phone. But once again, I'm trying not to be mean but give him a chance so...

Fast Forward - I made plans to meet up with him on Monday evening because I thought my day was going to be uneventful. But that was wishful thinking and so I had to cancel, however I did reschedule for Friday evening. But at this point I'm just dreading it. Now I have to deal with daily text messages I have no interest in answering and getting pictures that I didn't ask for.

Wish Me Luck (or Pray 4 Me)...

I will definitely have to update my peeps on what happens Friday night...don't worry I'll let him down easy, lol (or maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised, who knows).

More SingleNFabulous Shenanigans to come in 2016...Stay Tuned...

Smooches!

A Year in Review...My 2015

Hi Beautiful People,

My sad pathetic ass is currently sitting in front of my television watching Mission: Impossible Rogue Nation because I don't have shit to do this New Year's Eve! I've also been dealing with migraines for the past 2 days so even if I did have plans I wouldn't be able to enjoy them anyway...Yeah this sucks! But I didn't want to go into the New Year without writing to you guys one more time, so I decided to write this Blog entry to close out the end of 2015.

Do I want to throw myself a pity party YES. Why you ask? Because 2015 did not go the way I planned it and I'm pissed.


But truthfully I'm really just disappointed in myself because I didn't have a plan and therefore I had nothing tangible to help hold myself accountable. It's very hard to make adjustments to how you normally do things when you're use to doing them a certain way. Meaning...I'm a creature of habit and therefore not a fan of change especially when I don't have what I believe to be  "expert knowledge" on how to successfully make a change. But this doesn't mean I shouldn't keep trying. If you fail to plan, you plan to fail. So I will be making some changes next year!!



Maybe it's just me but I think 2015 flew by this year. Some good things happened and some not so good things happened but that's life!


Did I meet my weight loss Goals this year... No
Did I meet my future spouse this year... No
Did I meet my Blog goals this year... No

But Am I going to Quit... NO
I just have to make some adjustments and figure out what works best for Me!

So I'm going to leave you with a few Inspirational Quotes to start the New Year off Right!



Thanks to All my SinglenFab Followers for riding with me in 2015! It's occurred to me that some of us don't either have the time or don't make the time to sit down and read but you guys continue to support me through my journey of Shenanigans.

Here's to a FUN & FABULOUS 2016!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

The Adventures of SingleNFabulous will only Get Better Next Year...

Smooches

10 Assumptions Men make About Single Women in L. A. - Finding Bae!

Hi Beautiful People,

There was a contest (that I entered and didn't win) that motivated me to write this Blog. Despite my disappointment I think it turned out pretty funny but I'd rather hear your thoughts (male and female alike)! So grab a drink and tell me what you think. Feel free to share it with your friends too, Enjoy!

Being a single woman in L.A. is not all it’s cracked up to be. As this city is considered THE most popular city on the West Coast this can be a blessing and a curse, from the horrendous traffic to the influx of new people moving here to become #instafamous. As a result, the competition to get a Husband is Brutal. Here’s just a small taste of what I experience while living in Los Angeles.

The $hit I have to go through being Single in L.A.

10 Assumptions Men make About Single Women in L. A. - Finding Bae!

1. We are intimidating because we have our “$hit” together!
Yes I am highly educated and I am focused on my career. I don’t waste my time on lazy men because a man with goals and ambition is SEXY. But I also need you to be able to step up to the plate and ask a girl out. I don’t bite, unless you want me too (wink).

2. You assume that we are “bougie” because you watch Reality TV and think that we are all “Hollywood”.
 I’m an original L.A. girl and I love my city but trying to get a date out here is like “pulling teeth”. It doesn’t help that women outnumber men 10 to 1 (I’m just making those numbers up but that’s really what it feels like). Must we all fight over the same man?

3. Just because we have expectations you assume that our standards are “too high”.
No it means your standards are too low. Can’t a girl have SOME requirements?? I’m not saying he has to make 6 figures, be 6 feet tall and have 6 acres of land. But you can’t live with your mama, have 6 kids and make $6 an hour. I’m just saying!

4. You assume that something is “wrong” with us because we’re single
Why do I have to be “crazy” because I don’t have a man. Why can’t I just be waiting patiently for my “partner-in-crime”. Now I might drive by your house in the middle of the night if you don’t call me back but that’s only because I thought we had a “connection”, LMAO!

5. You assume that we are just too damn Independent
I concur. I really think that it’s just that we’ve been single for soooooooo long that we are so use to doing everything by ourselves that we have trouble giving up this role and relying on someone who may or may not want the responsibility. I mean think about it…a man comes into your life says all the right things and then the next thing you know he’s become very comfortable on your couch watching the NFL network, remote in one hand and balls in the other, then complains when you ask him to take out the trash. Which brings me to my next issue…

6. You assume we don’t cook.
This is simply not true. Times have changed. No I don’t cook 3 course meals like your mom did when you were growing up, after working a 12 hour day. But I can prep your meals on Sunday and you can have leftovers all week, Lol. Here’s an idea – Why don’t you cook and have a delicious meal ready when I come home (Ha! I think I’m asking too much)

7. You think you won’t be a priority in our lives.
Whaaaaat ??? I don’t know a woman who doesn’t want a MAN in her life.  We just want to make sure you are ready to make the commitment. I feel like the man waits until he's almost 40 years old before he finally decides okay I’ve played the field enough and I’m ready to settle down. Really??? My eggs have damn near dried up and my biological clock is hanging on for dear life. Then you wonder why we act like we don’t need you (refer back to #5).

8. You assume we have commitment issues…
But it's really "you" who has the commitment phobia. You want all the "wifey" perks but no investment. You want us to cook, clean, satisfy you BUT we just friends.

9. You are intimidated by us and assume we have a man.
This is actually more common than you think! I've noticed that men rarely approach me when I'm out with my girlfriends or even when I'm alone. I mean you can be low key stalking me and I wouldn't know it. I need a man to see me and NOT be intimidated but confident enough to make his move (put in the work)...OR I will chew you up and spit you out.

Which brings me to my last and Final point...

#10 What happened to "courting"? Do you even know what that is?? Did "chivalry" commit suicide??? Women like to be pursued, show your interest in her (introduce yourself, don’t send a friend to do it), pick up the phone and call her (yes I mean have an actual phone conversation), ask her out on a date (going to the movies is not a first date), meet her at the restaurant (no you can't come to my place I don't know you like that), pay for a meal, meet for happy hour or go have coffee (chivalry is not dead).

Now don't get me wrong I'm not into male bashing or breaking Guy Code because I love MEN. This is just a guideline for those guys who are guilty of either ONE or ALL of the above.

P.S. As a woman I am not completely oblivious to the fact that “us women” have our own issues too! BUT this isn't about us so come up with your own damn list about women who are “single & crazy” (Smile)

Until Next time...The Adventures of SingleNFabulous Must Go On!

Smooches